I have finally gained enough strength to write this quick update, it will be short and to the point, I can't handle much more.
I went the Doc Monday afternoon for an ultrasound at 6 weeks (according to measurements) and they saw a larger gestational sac with Sweet Pea inside. The sac and baby/fetal pole were both abnormally shaped and they could find no heartbeat. I was told to wait to miscarry, it should happen in 7-10 days. So far, I have not. It is extremely painful to carry around this baby inside of me that is not living. It's heartbreaking. There is about a 2% chance they could find a heartbeat at my next ultrasound (10-1-10) but they seemed pretty sure (and I feel) that isn't going to happen. On Monday, we will discuss further options (D&C).
I am angry and so hurt but trying to be strong. My friends and family are wonderful, I am so thankful for them and of course Colton is amazing as always and helps me remember that I should focus on everything I do have in this life and not dwell on what I do not.
13 hours ago